Why Home Meetings Are Better

A friend of mine who was on staff at a Baptist church wrote me and asked me if I could help the rest of his staff understand the value of having home meetings, which for them would be labeled "cell groups" (terrible name!) You can read here what I wrote him, including my concerns associated with a church starting a project like this. (Note: I am indebted to Frank Viola for elucidating these ideas in chapter four in his book Reimagining Church)

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1. Because the early Church met in homes.

And the believers went about breaking bread from HOUSE TO HOUSE. Acts 2:46
Greet Priscilla and Aquila . . . Likewise greet the church that is IN THEIR HOUSE. Romans 16:3,5
Salute the brethren which are in Laodicea, and Nymphas, and the church which is IN HIS HOUSE. Colossians 4:15
And to our beloved Apphia, and Archippus . . . and to the church IN YOUR HOUSE. Philemon 2

Aside from the apostolic meetings in the heart of Jerusalem, the early believers were known for their meeting from house to house, “breaking bread” together. Just as much of the gospels portray Jesus meeting with his disciples around a dinner table in homes, so the meetings of the early Church were largely meetings in homes around the dinner table. Outside of the Jerusalem church, the Gentile churches (who didn’t have resident apostles to regularly hold the big meetings) also located these meetings in the homes of the believers. Even in times when there was no persecution, the early believers made a habit of meeting in homes.

2. Meeting in homes/small groups provides the opportunity to act on all the “one anothering” verses (46 total in the New Testament – see bottom of page for full list).

Love ONE ANOTHER. As I have loved you, so you must love ONE ANOTHER. John 13:34
Be devoted to ONE ANOTHER in brotherly love. Honor ONE ANOTHER above yourselves. Romans 12:10
Greet ONE ANOTHER with a holy kiss. 1 Corinthians 16:20
Serve ONE ANOTHER in love. Galatians 5:13
Be kind and compassionate to ONE ANOTHER. Ephesians 4:32
Speak to ONE ANOTHER with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Ephesians 5:19
Submit to ONE ANOTHER out of reverence for Christ. Ephesians 5:21
Teach and admonish ONE ANOTHER with all wisdom. Colossians 3:16
Encourage ONE ANOTHER and build each other up. 1 Thessalonians 5:11
Encourage ONE ANOTHER daily. Hebrews 3:13
Let us consider how we may spur ONE ANOTHER on toward love and good deeds. Hebrews 10:24
Love ONE ANOTHER deeply, from the heart. 1 Peter 1:22
Offer hospitality to ONE ANOTHER without grumbling. 1 Peter 4:9
If we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with ONE ANOTHER. 1 John 1:7
Dear friends, let us love ONE ANOTHER. 1 John 4:7

The ministry of mutual edification in the Body of Christ can only be expressed in an environment that is open and participatory in design. How can believers effectively or regularly teach, admonish, and encourage one another when all of our meetings allow just one or two people to do all the sharing? Even the Sunday School environment is typically led by one or two individuals in such a way that discussion is permitted only within very narrow parameters. Some will argue that this “one anothering” must take place outside of the context of the meeting. But why should it? Nothing in the New Testament implies that this should be the case. Listen to the open atmosphere assumed by the following passage:

When you assemble, each one has a psalm, has a teaching, has a revelation, has a tongue, has an interpretation. Let all things be done for edification . . . Let two or three prophets speak, and let the others pass judgment. But if a revelation is made to another who is seated, the first one must keep silent. For you can all prophesy one by one, so that all may learn and all may be exhorted. (1 Corinthians 14:26-31)

3. Only home meetings capture and express the family atmosphere of the Church.

The most frequent word in the NT is “brethren” (literally, “brothers and sisters”). Of all the metaphors of the Church utilized in the NT (bride, field, house, city, etc), the Family metaphor is the most prominent by far. But it’s hard to see the Church as a family when meetings are restricted to large, formal gatherings in auditoriums with pews, or else in classrooms with metal chairs., fluorescent lighting, teachers, and roll sheets. Home meetings provide the opportunity for members of your church (as well as non-members) to get to know one another well. All too frequently attendees in church services cannot even name the people sitting in front of them or behind them. That should not be.

4. Only home fellowships allow for the companionship and accountability for which believers are so hungry.

The assembling of Christians must somehow occur in everyday (i.e. “relevant”) places for our faith to completely and consistently work itself out. If believers do not fellowship with one another in natural, comfortable settings (like a living room, a kitchen, a dining room, or a back yard), then they will not know each other WELL. Meeting in homes encourages authenticity and simplicity in our interactions with one another. Believers are far less tempted to smile and say everything is “fine” when they are not wearing a coat and tie, or high heels and hose. It is also my conviction that evangelicals have become so task-oriented that we consider deep and intimate fellowship irrelevant. Thus fellowship is relegated to a superficial 30 second time slot in which we shake the hands of 5 people around us. This also should not be!

5. God’s house is the people, and meeting anywhere other than in the church facilities helps to communicate that fact.

The Church is people. The New Testament never identifies the Church with a building. It is no wonder that we tend to compartmentalize our faith and fail to apply it to our everyday lives. The way we meet leads many to believe that God’s presence and activity are limited to one particular place (and one particular day). The reality is that He indwells His people, and that He therefore is very much “in the world.”

Incidentally, it is a well known axiom that architecture and living spaces have meaning. How a room is arranged speaks volumes about what happens there. It is difficult to perceive that 1.) God’s residence is the people, 2.) Christ alone is “in charge” of His Church, and that 3.) the Church is an intimate family when a.) we limit our meetings to one special place, b.) we always line up in rows facing an elevated speaker, and c.) our primary view of our brothers and sisters is the back of their heads. We should meet more often away from our pews and classrooms.

6. Unbelievers are less threatened by (and therefore more likely to darken the doorway of) a small, informal home gathering.

It is very possible that this is one of the primary reasons that the early Church could grow so much more quickly than the modern Church. Growth can be exponential in situations where the church assembles in multiple locations, especially when this arrangement encourages the active functioning of all the members of the Body of Christ. This intimate “connected,” relational style of interaction also produces a much higher retention of “converts” simply because they are being introduced not only to a Christ in Heaven, but also to a very tangibly present Christ on earth in the company of believers.

A word must be added here: While the above reason for meeting in home groups is quite true, I include it at the end of the list because it is my opinion that we emphasize outreach and growth at the expense of all other aspects of church life. Each time a new avenue for developing community is introduced, it quickly becomes merely a tool for church growth. The result is that no one notices the utter lack of intimacy within the Body of Christ. The Body does not grow together and develop properly because all energy is expended in an outward direction. We would do well to preserve at least one thing in the church for the purpose of encouraging a more intimate communal life among the members of the Body.

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If I may, I’d like to offer three suggestions:

A. Start with meals. Eating dinner together provides a natural setting for getting to know people. It’s the ultimate ice breaker. Regardless of whether or not meals become a part of the home group’s regular meetings, it’s a good way to start.

Furthermore, you shouldn’t be afraid to regularly include “unspiritual” activities on the agenda. Community evolves around all kinds of activities and normal life includes more than just prayer, Bible study, worship, and discussion. Since part of the goal is to get to know one another, anything that moves in that direction is fair game.

B. Ask the groups what they want to do. Perhaps provide a number of options, but let the groups themselves determine their own direction. The Church is not a machine and you cannot dictate their interests and experiences. Trust God’s Spirit to lead His people. Some helpful suggestions might include reading a book together (of THEIR choice), or having a discussion group, or a prayer group, or just dinners. Maybe they want to go through a book of the Bible together (not necessarily out of someone else’s literature). Maybe the young parents are looking for something they can bring their kids to, like a playgroup (a great way for young parents to connect with other young parents).

Where possible, however, avoid overly categorizing groups according to demographic similarities. When else in Church life do younger people have the opportunity to hang out with (and really get to know) their older brothers and sisters in Christ?

C. Above all, please, please, please resist the compulsion to control and micromanage these groups. Most ministers hyperventilate at the thought of releasing control of the Body of Christ. But according to Ephesians 4:11-16, the job of every ministry in the Church is the equipping of the saints to function as the Body, with “every joint supplying” what it has for the edification of the Church. A church is not maturing if it never receives any opportunities to develop and function without “the gifted ones” in charge. In an atmosphere of mutual edification, there is a balancing effect on the teaching that goes on, so you need not fear that they will all drift into heresy simply because a staff member or a Sunday School teacher isn’t present. “In the abundance of counselors there is wisdom”(Prov.11:14). Also John assures us that “You all have the anointing and have no need of someone to teach you”(1 John 2:27). Ministers who believe that are a rarity. May their tribe increase.

Bottom line: Trust the Holy Spirit to guide God’s people into the things of Christ.

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“One Another” Verses